Je suis La (I’m still here)…

There it is, on the wall in all it’s digital beauty. I almost hear it yelling at me; “turn me on, watch Netflix 18 hours a day…lose yourself in me”. 
A younger version of myself would surely listen to such sage advice from that black shiny box. But now I am older and much wiser than that youthful sun worshipping tv watching version of myself. I walk away from the television and instead return to my phone. Not to call, not to surf or postulate on social media. No, this is my time to better myself. To study or better yet; je vais étudier. 

I grew up in Canada. French was a daily part of our school curriculum. It seems like I took French every day of my school life. I can still sing that French classic “bonhomme-bonhomme” from 5th grade. I even somehow managed to get my wife and I around France for our honeymoon. But I digress…I want to do something constructive with my time while the chemo therapy does something destructive. I pick up my phone and touch the Duolingo App button and voila…daily French lessons. If only I could get my wife to bake croissants…

 I need to say this again; there are so many people undergoing so many worse things than I am right now. My face feels deeply burnt. The overall red tone continues to deepen with splotchy areas that are way too tender to touch. The burning/itchy factor of my face is one million squared. With that said let me go all kinda moody on you. There is a correlation between your face and your mood. Smile; and you tend to feel happy. Frown; and you feel like listening to Bauhaus while crying in a lukewarm bath (mundane 80s music reference, sorry). At this point smiling or using any overt facial expression is a little bit of a problem, because it hurts to do so. Not to say I can’t do it, but it has varying degrees of extreme discomfort and pain. This creates a problem in that it stops me using my “guitar face” during any air guitar solos while listening to 80s hair bands. Ain’t life grand.

Thanks for stopping by. Fin du jour 7 … merci, bonne nuit

God Bless, remember to smile.

-Ian

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Author: ianmn

FOX 9 Chief Meteorologist Ian Leonard...love my life, love my wife, love my daughters and love my dog...kinda like the cat. I am the #stayskyaware dude.

18 thoughts on “Je suis La (I’m still here)…”

  1. Thank you, Ian. I’ve loved watching you on TV, was worried about you when you needed glasses, and now concerned. But, you, as no one else in my experience, are bringing me a real look at a process one never hears of. My sister had severe cancer, had a stem-cell transplant, has survived…and I know your journey already better than I have known hers. Again, thank you. You are a gift.

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  2. Stay strong ! The outcome of this journey will be worth it and this will make your family stronger. You aren’t going through this alone we are all with you and your family every step of the way with our thoughts and prayers.

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  3. Just a little inside info from a ‘been there done that’ kinda person. Careful with your phone and TV as it gives off extra light that your face is sensitive to. Also take advantage of the cold weather, after the sun goes down bundle up your body and let the cold cool your face. (Currently doing this treatment once a week for indefinitely, at this time. “Preventative” now.) Trust me, it’s worth it! Good luck, continually thinking of you!!

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  4. Thinking of you and your family, Ian. You are my favorite news guy since I love your quirky jokes. I’m impressed by your ability to share your experience with others and to help spread the word about skin cancer. It was a pleasure to meet you at the fair years ago -and I am sending healing wishes your way!

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  5. Thanks for doing the blog Ian – now, at least, I can hear from you and how you’re doing more often. Hang in there – we are all on this journey with you my friend. I grew up in Canada also and took French from 3rd grade on up – don’t remember much any more. Good night and God Bless…

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  6. I did not know you grew up in Canada and spoke French. That’s awesome. I like your choice of “constructive” activity! I have French heritage but never bothered to branch out and study the language. I know merci. Which I offer to you for sharing your journey. You’re an amazing man, Ian! Keep the faith. Trust the chemistry. Close you eyes, engage your minds eye and let those facial expressions fly. Your brain and feelings will respond without even moving a facial muscle.

    Blessings and prayers for you.

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  7. Ian, I miss you on TV, but I’m glad you’ve invited me to be part of your life here. To share with me your ups and downs. I will continue to pray for you as you do for others. You are truly an inspiration!!

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  8. Bon Jovi,
    Sorry can’t speak French, but thought I would try. It’s a rainy day here. We lived in Wisconsin and Minnesota (11 years in each state) We sure don’t miss that weather. So glad to have found home here in southern Iowa.
    Cancer is a royal pain, but it’s beatable. My mom is a survivor and going strong at 87.
    Hang in there Ian. Better days are ahead.

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  9. Clearly, your sense of humor still goes to 11, even though your facial expressions (temporarily) can’t. Thanks for throwing some French into today’s post. I’m not Canadian, but I had enough French in high school and college that I really should remember more than I do. You’re helping stir up those French memories!

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  10. We pray for relief from pain and a good outcome. We have an older gentleman in our church that went through the same thing so we saw first hand how he looked because his wife posted pictures on Facebook. He looks great now and so far so good. Keep the faith!

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